Things you shouldn't do on stage.

/ gigs, etiquette

After our set on Saturday night, I saw someone do something that you should never, ever do.

Over the weekend, we went on a road trip up to Sydney to play a set.

Good times, fun had by all, etc, but I saw something horrible.

Something so obscene that I shudder to think about it, let alone relate it to you.

The band who played after us began in an unusual manner. The music was fine. Very agressive, sure, but that's a subjective issue - they performed it quite well (or so I thought). After the applause from their mates in the front row and the rest of the crowd, the vocalist mumbled something to the effect of "dunno why you're clapping, we fucked that up heaps".

Uh, okay dude.

Rule the first: Never, ever apologise to the audience, unless it's for something beyond your control (power outage, meteor strike, last drinks, etc).

The set proceeded in what I thought was a fairly normal manner, but at the end, the drummer launched himself to the front of the stage, grabbed the mic, pointed at the sound guy, and yelled "you're fucked mate, the sound was fucked and you're shithouse", and proceeded to disassemble his kit by throwing his cymbals onto the stage, on top of each other, making as much noise as possible.

Rule the second: Never, ever, EVER criticise the sound guy publically.

especially when your foldback was fucked because your guitarist kicked over the mic in front of his amp halfway through the set.

There's no room for fucktardery in this business. What do you reckon those guys' chances of landing another gig at that venue are?

Not even slim. Sweet fuck all, I'd reckon.

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